Learning to Accept and Adapt

You might recognize this house from the news reports coming out of SW Montana with all of the flooding we've experienced earlier this week.  Both the house and adjacent garage went down the Yellowstone River on Monday.  This is literally a block from where I'm living, across the street.  This was a housing unit for Yellowstone employees working inside the park.

Last night, this is what it looked like along the Yellowstone River.  Not only were the buildings gone, so was a significant portion of the river's shoreline and the surrounding trees.  Simply heartbreaking to see.

While Monday was looking rather bleak, giving everyone stranded here pause for concern, the local authorities and the Montana DOT worked feverishly to assess the damage to the road heading north, making it possible for the tourists to continue their vacations outside of the devastated area at the North Entrance to Yellowstone National Park.  Guests and park employees over in Cooke City and in the communities at the North East Entrance are not as fortunate, as there is still much to be done to get them out of the towns affected by the floods and damaged roads.

There was horrific damage to Yellowstone National Park's road system and infrastructure.  Many areas inside the park had no electricity for hours, doing into days.  The main power line into the park was also washed away here in Gardiner, literally 100 yards north of where the house washed way.  Throughout the day Monday and Tuesday, the electric company was working on restoring power.  They were using helicopters to provide assistance to the linemen working the project. 

I've been told power has been restored as of late yesterday, which is good news for the park to be able to reopen and resume operations, hopefully by first of the week.  It's already been reported by the National Park Service, that the northern/upper loop inside the park will not resume normal operations this season.

For anyone interested in the most current information and park status, it is best you follow the information being share on the Yellowstone National Park website.  I will tell you, there is a lot of misinformation out there coming from inside the park on social media . . . mostly from concessionaire employees who either have limited information from their employers or are simply making things up to suit their own narrative.

On a more personal note, so far this experience has contributed to my continued personal growth of learning to be patient and to realize there are things in life that are simply beyond my control.  Admittedly, I have struggled throughout my life (both personally and professionally) with what many know as the Serenity Prayer.

I don't need a 12-step program to be enlightened by the concept, and yet I have struggled (especially at work) when dealing with others.  Sometimes working for associations and other membership type groups, you are beholden to a board of directors, other volunteers, members and outside stakeholders.  Too often, personal agendas, lack of knowledge/experience and egos get in the way.  I've learned perhaps the hard way, that some things you just cannot change.  And if you are unable to accept it, and move forward as best you can, you must make the change necessary for YOU to be happy.

This week, in spite of the devastation and uncertainty all around me, I was remarkably at peace.  I knew there were several scenarios possible . . . from "nothing will change" to "I'm going home because my gig is over" . . . but all that would play into such, would most likely be well beyond my scope of control or influence.  All I really could do was to do what I do best, think out logical scenarios that MIGHT occur, and determine my own personal course of action for each.

I feel this has been a moment of growth for me!  I am comfortable with where I am, my game plan moving forward, and if the course of direction is changed . . . so be it.  I will get by and all will be fine.

Not Taking ANYthing for Granted

I am dedicating this blog post to my friend and brother-in-law Rex!  For those of you who know me, or follow me on Facebook, you know Pam (my sister) and Rex are an important part of my life . . . best friends in fact.  You may also know he recently passed away after a second bout of cancer.

Rex came into "our lives" back in 1986, when he moved into "The Townhouse" where my then boyfriend Ken was living.  Not long after that, he met and married Pam.  They'd been married for 35 years!

The four of us back then, and later after my divorce from Ken, the four of us including David were friends.  In spite of my moving to Wisconsin in 1994, I spent a lot of time with Pam & Rex over the decades.  And in more recent years, we traveled quite a bit including trips to Florida, Tennessee, New England and the US National Parks of the Rocky Mountains in Colorado & Wyoming.  I visited them often back home in Virginia, most recently this past Thanksgiving.

I've already written that COVID changed much of my thinking about life and what is important to me.  Family and making time for those I love and care about became a renewed emphasis in many of my personal decisions . . . ultimately including my decision to leave BCAW in 2022.  "Retirement" per se wasn't as much of a factor as just wanting to dedicate my time and effort to those in my life who are important to me  And while yes, "work" and "bowling" were important, they just had lost their luster during the pandemic.

During the early part of 2020, several people who had been very important to me died.  First was my ex-husband Ken and shortly thereafter, another dear friend $teve $ipe.  David was caring for one of his long-time friends Marney, who was also struggling with cancer and due to COVID ended up unable to continue treatment outside of her senior living facility.  When she died, we only found out about a month later, while doing an obituary search.  I cried because I knew she died alone, but also thankful we had spent a lovely holiday with her in late 2019 and could treasure those memories.  David did see her just prior to the COVID "safer at home" lock down, but I still think it sucks she died alone!

So back to Rex . . .

Rex was given the news that his renal cancer was back, but in new places.  This came near the start of the pandemic, and with the news that he probably had one to three years as the cancer was not treatable with chemo, radiation or surgery.  A pretty shit prognosis to know you are facing the end, thanks to the beast known as cancer.  And a real shock too, because he had been more than five years cancer-free, a benchmark all cancer survivors pray for.  Rex faced this reality with strength and positivity, and a real zest for life with his family and friends.

None of us know how much time we have here on the Third Rock from the Sun.  Rex's diagnosis hit very close to home for me, not only as my sister's husband, but as a fellow cancer survivor. (I've been cancer free since my surgical treatment for ovarian cancer in 2015.)  Making time every day, month and year for those important in my life, had become a renewed priority.  And that included my decision to step away from my executive level position and all that entails.  THAT became MY new priority.

While it was a decision that was probably building for months, it really reached a decision making head literally the weekend before an upcoming board meeting as I prepared my resignation letter to give to my board of directors in less than 72 hours.  I was solid in my resolve, supported by my family and clear in my conscience that it was not only best for me but also best for my association.

When the end came for Rex, I don't think any of us were really prepared for it.  He and Pam had just been in Milwaukee the month prior, and while feeling the effects from the beast raging inside his body, he was doing pretty well and getting along day-to-day.  Folks that spent time with us on the WI Vintage Alleys Tour remarked after his death, how shocked they too were.  For him to have taken a turn in such a short period of time (less than three weeks) and be dead a month to the day from their leaving Milwaukee, is just a hard reality to come to grip with.

All of this ties to what I'm doing now . . . today . . . living in the moment for the here and now.  I cannot take ANYthing for granted.  Not next week, next month or next year!  And while I'm sure some might not understand my choice to take roughly 20 weeks to be away from David and my family in Wisconsin, I know others can fully appreciate the choice I've made to pursue a dream while I'm still physically able to do so.

Nothing is promised or guaranteed.  In business we talk about being ready if the proverbial bus hits us (or a co-worker).  And yes, that could happen while I'm out here living in Montana and working in Yellowstone National Park.  But with David's love, support and blessing I am living the dream!

Here's to happy memories with Rex & Pam!

A Packers' Bar in Florida

 

Dinner in Milwaukee

New Year's Eve in Virginia

Random Photo Download

Well it was my intention to share a more thorough post with photos from here in Yellowstone this afternoon, but once the skies cleared, I headed into the park for a couple of hours.  So here I am after 9:00pm with some photos of the animals I've seen so far.

Keep in mind, not all are great shots, as sometimes they are just too far away . . . moving to quickly . . . or hidden in dense vegetation, etc.  So for now, please enjoy this random dump of images from my first four trips into the park (May 24th, May 25th, June 1st and June 5th).

Adios until next time!

Two Weeks - Four Park Visits

I arrived here in Gardiner two weeks ago today.  It seems like so much longer ago, because of all that I've already done and seen here.  My work is going well (I've actually worked seven days since arriving) and I've been able to spend a little time in Yellowstone National Park.

With the high cost of gas ($4.99 as of this writing) . . . and expected to continue to go up throughout the summer . . . my initial thoughts of spending A LOT of time inside the park might not happen.  Yesterday I filled up inside the park for the first time, and even with my YPSS employee discount (we operate the service stations), it was $54 for 12 gallons (I still had a quarter tank when I gassed up).  I could easily see myself spending a tank or two a week given a "short trip" inside the park is 100 miles and a moderate one is 250, give or take.  So a short + moderate trip would be one tank or $65~ish.

I do like that I am so close to the NE Entrance (less than two miles from my apartment to the gate.  And the upper portion of the Grand Loop Road has some outstanding wildlife viewing opportunities including the world famous Lamar Valley, aka the Serengeti of North America (or so they say).  Bison, moose, wolves, bears, pronghorn and big horn sheep all call this home.  Some days it's a challenge to see any animals, and others they seem to be everywhere . . . especially the bison.  Here's a short video of the bison jam I was in last Wednesday night after work. 

Over the past seven years, I have vacationed here in late May/early June.  I cannot remember so much snow still on the ground . . . and NEVER ice still on Lake Yellowstone.  Locals tell me they had lower than normal snowfall this past winter, so all I can think is that it's been colder than normal this spring hence the lack of melting of snow and ice throughout the area.  It is true what the say that the park never looks the same . . . year-to-year and month-to-month.  I'm excited to see it again this year, just a little different that in my past visits.

Lake Yellowstone May 25th

Dunraven Pass June 1st

With springtime comes wonderful waterfalls as the snow caps melt.  And with all the rain we've had over the past couple of weeks, they are especially beautiful.  This is one of the roadside waterfalls on the East Entrance Road.  There have been times in the past when I've driven by this spot and it was barely a trickle!

Rain is good, and it's the reason why I'm here at home on my day off processing photos and blogging instead of being out in the park today.  I woke up to loud rain against my window, and the forecast throughout the region is for more rain.  So I decided to stay in and take advantage of the time to share more on my blog!

For true outdoors people, rain doesn't deter them from being out, doing what they love.  Yesterday I saw men out fly fishing in the rivers that run through the west side of the park.  They look like dots here but I loved this image!  "Everything" you think of when you talk about Yellowstone NP. 

Some of the streams are still snow packed, as the water runs through melting along the shoreline.  I found this to be a pretty scene as I was driving through the park one afternoon

It's been fun watching families as they drive through the areas still covered with snow.  Children playing in the snow, making snowmen and doing things that kids growing up in the deep south may never have experienced.  I like to try to see the world from the perspective of others . . . and especially a child filled with wonderment for things they have never experienced.

This is one of the marvelous things about Yellowstone National Park . . . there is always something to marvel at . . . experiences and sights yet to be had.  You just never know what you may find yourself encountering on any given day because each day brings a new view.

Who Knew? Von Is a Bookkeeper!

Many know the inside joke with me that while I'm pretty good at the business side of financial management like budgeting and projecting organizational performance, I AM NOT AN ACCOUNTANT!  Too often in non/not-for-profit organizations, volunteers and staff do not understand these are different skill sets.  With my last executive director position, there continued to be challenges for me, which at the end of the day, was part of the reason for my deciding it was time to move on from BCAW as their executive director.

I doubt anyone would challenge my expertise in providing a foundation that would provide the association seven very solid years financially, and for the most part, we were able to assure our accounting practices were fundamentally sound.  Well, that is, until March 2021 when "the big woo" happened.  Then things seemingly came unraveled at the seams.  Sadly, I struggled to get some folks to understand being an executive director and good business manager was not the same as being a bookkeeper (a position BCAW has had pre-dating my tenure).

Anyway, I share this because some would find the irony that I left an executive level position, to get away from the issues relative to the accounting function, including bookkeeping, and yet, here I am today living in Montana where my primary function is doing bookkeeping and auditing various reports for YPSS.

YPSS is the Yellowstone Park Service Stations . . . one of several concessionaires approved to provide guest services inside the confines of Yellowstone National Park.  This is through Federal contract, that we operate the seven service stations (gas & convenience stores), plus four service/repair shops.  My days working for Southland Corporation/7-Eleven is coming in handy, some 30 years later.

My daily work consists of review/auditing the sales reports for each of the seven locations, plus maintaining inventory reports for all.  Gasoline is a big part of our business model, so having accurate daily reports for senior management is essential.  My critical eye and attention to detail is a great asset in the work I'm doing now.

I have an office co-worker who is also new to YPSS this year, so together we are learning all facets of the accounting functions under the leadership of the accounting manager.  She started about two weeks before I did, and her tasks are more accounting in nature than much of what I'm doing currently.  Today was just my fifth day of work . . . and each day I'm being taught additional tasks in the accounting process for the store locations' financials.  I must be doing well, because they keep giving me something additional in the work flow towards the end result.  I leave each day feeling I've accomplished something . . . learned something more to help with the overall work effort . . . and knowing I can leave at 5pm and not worry about anything more until I'm back in the office at 8am my next scheduled day.

The other essential duty I perform is relative to providing emergency roadside assistance to those park visitors who may incur troubles with their automobile or RV.  We have wrecker service to cover the entire park including roads and campgrounds.  While the accounting work is pretty black and white, the responding to inbound calls and dispatching wrecker services, take a bit more problem solving and creativity.  It's a nice yin to the yang in my daily work.  And our shop managers and their team members are wonderful to work with.

I feel very blessed that this job opportunity became available to me this year, after two disappointing years of it not working out.  This is a small company, and everyone is treated like family . . . like family you like!  I cannot say enough good things about my co-workers and the culture that exists to help others.

So at the end of this summer, I can add "accounting clerk" to my resume. My LinkedIn profile has already been updated.  Who knows what the future will hold for me in 2023 and beyond?

Theodore Roosevelt National Park (North Dakota)

As I stated in my last post, my past trips to Yellowstone have typically gone through either North or South Dakota.  When I do the southern route, I typically stop and overnight in Badlands National Park in South Dakota.  The campground there is very nice and convenient as a stopping point or even for a couple of nights.

Because my final destination was Gardiner, Montana rather than Yellowstone National Park itself, the northern route made more sense which made Theodore Roosevelt National Park my first night destination.

My Sunday drive from Milwaukee to Dickinson, ND was very nice . . . sunny clear skies, with light highway traffic.  Arriving to my motel around nightfall, I got a nice night's sleep so I could venture into the park for a few hours before continuing my trek west to Montana.

Theodore Roosevelt National Park seems to be one that is very underutilized.  I have stopped here several times in past years, car camping either on my way west or my way home.  With my SUV looking like this, there was no camping for me.  That's alright though, as I enjoyed having a nice hot shower when I got in, plus the free morning snacks they call breakfast.

I arrived to the park entrance before 7a and pretty much had the place to myself.  This was particularly good news as I was hoping to see the wild horses that live here in the northern badlands.  I wasn't disappointed as the first band of horses were right at the vista lookout just a few miles inside the park boundaries.  There was a couple of young colts, plus older ones still nursing.  The band stallion was attentive to all that was happening around them, and when another car pulled into the parking lot with me, he moved his family to the other side of the road.  They continued to graze, not really paying much attention to us.

Beyond this point, much of the park access is closed due to poor road conditions.  A few years ago, the road washed away in one area and since that time, other issues have caused additional closures.  It's unfortunate as usually visitors can drive the entire loop road of the "lower unit" in about 2 hours, seeing some pretty amazing views plus lots of wildlife.  For my visit, however, it would be an "in and back out" trip of roughly 20 miles each way.

The prairie dog town was a ghost town when I drove into the park, probably due to the drizzly morning, because when I came back through, they were very active on the prairie.  When they detect danger approaching, the come up to see what's going on, and begin "chirping" to let others know.

There are also bison in this area, but the herds must have been far away in better grazing areas as their calves are born in early spring.  All I really saw were a few lone bulls like this one, which are generally pretty solitary. Of course, the scenery around them makes the photographic image.

I was fortunate to stumble upon a couple more bands of horses further inside the park.  The largest of what I saw included one stallion who only had mating on his mind.  When I first drove into the area, his entire group was together on one side of the road.  But when I came back through towards the park exit, he had separated himself and a mare to the other side.

I was curious about it so I stopped and turned off my car (again, I had the park mostly to myself so stopping in the middle of the road for a few minutes wasn't putting me in danger or impeding traffic . . . as in "what traffic?")  My patience and time waiting paid off as I got to enjoy another "National Geographic" moment in the wild.  The mare, however, wasn't too interested . . . vocalized and kicked him off several times!  Give him A for effort as he kept trying until he lost "it".  Now you know why they say "hung like a horse."

It's Been a Week!

I left Wisconsin on Sunday (5/22) heading west for Montana where I'd start my new normal as I continue to ease towards a retired lifestyle.  I kissed David good-bye, scratched Lizzy behind the ears and headed off for new adventures with a simpler pace.

Driving 1,400 miles over roughly 20 hours (and two days), the drive was unlike any of my prior road trips to Yellowstone National Park.  Sure, I took the same general route, this year was through North Dakota (rather than South Dakota), but my thoughts were more at peace than ever before.

You see, since 2016 I have made this trip every summer except one.  It was usually right after the bowling season, when I could finally check out and away from work and people.  But regardless of my intent to check out, that rarely happened during the initial drive from home.  Some years, it took nearly a week for me to finally be AWAY, not thinking of work and the challenges that face most association executives . . . staffing issues . . . challenges with volunteers & board members . . . providing more and better services with fewer available resources . . . creating and sustaining an operational structure that is financially viable for the members served.  As folks like the say, the reason why we're paid "the big bucks."

Some trips were actually painful to return from, because of the challenges I knew would still be there when I got home from the time away.  And it only got worse with the new world order that would result from COVID in 2020.  It was this reality that brought me clarity regarding my life's journey and what would soon come.

This year, however, my drive from Milwaukee wasn't like that.  Rather than looking back and trying to deal with issues I knew I would soon have to deal with when I returned home, this year my trip was filled with excitement and anticipation, for not having to return to the issues and challenges you agree to handle when you are a not-for-profit executive.  For the first time in over eight years, I have the luxury and comfort to finally be able to say THAT IS NOT MY PROBLEM!

God does it feel good to finally say that out loud . . . for the world to hear.

Another reality check for me thanks to the pandemic was that people you trusted and thought to be your friends, or at least on your side, often cannot and should not be trusted.  The past two years have left me frustrated, sad, angry, empty and defeated many times.  I learned quickly, who I could afford to have in my life, and who would become collateral damage.  This was most true in my work life, making it a rather easy decision when I told my association board of directors I'd be leaving as their executive director in a few short months.

During my drive last Sunday, I wasn't even out of Wisconsin when a couple of the BCAW board members called me to thank me for my time and service to the association.  Those calls, as well as the handful of others received during my last week with BCAW (along with email messages) will be how I will choose to remember my tenure since 2014.  It will be those people who recognized and appreciated my unwavering commitment and passion for our work, that sustained me over the years, and will continue to provide the correct perspective about all we accomplished together.

Perhaps more telling about people, and validating my decision that was time to move on, was the absence of acknowledgement from people who could not have been bothered to take a few minutes out of their busy lives to say THANK YOU.  Perhaps most deafening was the complete silence from anyone affiliated with BPAA on the staff or volunteer level.  WELL . . . YOU ARE WELCOME ANYWAY!

I know this comes across as bitter, but it's really not. It's simply a noted fact of life that too often people will smile to your face, grace you with shallow platitudes to make themselves feel good.  I'm comforted in knowing I am a far better person than those who I had to endure and deal with for the past several years in order to do my best job for the bowling center owners in Wisconsin (and Michigan's UP).

All in all . . . the bowling people I have had the opportunity to meet and work with are some of the kindest and sincere I've been blessed to have in my life.  I look forward to continuing with many of those friendships throughout my summer here in Yellowstone, as well as when I return home to Wisconsin in the fall.

Until that time, I look forward to sharing with those interested in following along, my experiences and perspectives living in a place that marches to the beat of a different drummer, where I have responsibility for only myself and my actions, and where nature provides perspective every single day on what is important and what to let go of.

And with that, I am fully letting go as I continue to enjoy the positive mojo that living in God's Country brings.